然後…意識開始渙散，進入微醺的Alpha波狀態….here it starts…
I limit myself in a confined space, so I can consolidate my consciousness and deal with this material world.
Sometimes I feel I need to reach out and express myself so I could maintain this form.
Like Law of Action and Reaction, I project my energy to the world, and wait for the world’s response to stimulate my senses, so as to reassert my existence.
This world is vague to me; to adapt to this world, I have to concentrate and focus my mind very hard, so I could see the blurred lines as clear boundaries, separating individual A from individual B.
My strong mind grounds me and keeps me from drifting away; however, that mind brings me strong desire to express and prove myself as well.
I want to obey my essence, which is to just “be", but I want to be able to “work" in this material world at the same time.
Unfortunately, “being" and “working" are two contradictory concepts in this reality, and hence the dilemma.
If I was just “being" in my working place, my job wouldn’t be done itself until I “work" on it.
Maybe, giving up the desire of “working in this world" is the way to free my mind from current limited state.
Maybe, when I stop trying hard reaching out, and refilling myself by strong self-expression, my solid existence will dissolve.
By the time I become like air, intangible but everywhere, “being" will be what’s “working".